More Of Gravy Than Of Grave?

I have always been a night eater.

That could even be my superhero name: “I am the Night Eater! I eat sugary sweets within cover of darkness!” (stolen from an old Paul Reiser SNL sketch, in which he was the Night Stalker)

So, it came as no surprise to me that last night at 9:00 I found myself awake, in the bed, watching Up All Night and secretly inhaling the rest of the bag of semi-sweet chocolate chips. Thankfully, I thought back on something I had read in Working Out Sucks! earlier that day. On page 74 Rebecca DeRossett talks about how we can learn new behaviors like learning a new language or playing the piano. We can then use this same capacity to learn new eating habits. Now, back in the bed I was having a fierce inner dialogue: “Those semi-sweet chips are supra-delicious!” “But you aren’t even hungry.” “Oh, I am hungry. Hungry for some half bitter chocolate nibs!” “No, you don’t need them. Imagine the look your wife would give you, were she still awake.” “Yeah, good point. You win this round sensible Evan.” “Well, it was lovely to see you again obsessive Evan.” (You think I am making this up, but I actually talk to myself in this way) I won the fight against the chocolate chips, turned out the light and went to sleep. Then came the night terrors.

Nikki and I had a pound of meat in the freezer that has been there for quite a while so we decided to make tacos last night. Last time we went grocery shopping Nikki found these tortillas:

Look at those fonts! If they put that much time into their packaging, they surely have filled the tortillas with beautiful nutrition. The only problem was that I proceeded to fill the tortilla with sour cream, cheese, salsa and meat. Not the best dinner I could have had, but I didn’t eat near as much as I usually would so I am proud of that. Anyway, back to the night terror. For some reason me and my little brother were driving around in what appeared to be a 1984 Lincoln towncar when all of the sudden I heard whistling and a children’s giggle followed by “I see you!” I looked out the window as we passed by different homes and there in each window we passed was a little girl in a poofy dress staring straight ahead. I immediately woke up and felt like the little girl was still behind me staring and starting quoting Psalm 23 from memory. Except I think I got some of the words wrong. I got through the shadow of death, but I couldn’t remember if the next part had to do with still water or something else. I finally started muttering “there’s more than gravy than of grave about you” under my breath (in case you are wondering I got that from Muppet’s Christmas Carol and not from my Dickensian memory) and was able to fall back asleep. This whole episode really got me to thinking about how minute changes in your diet can really affect you! Eat your vegetables kids! Otherwise the whistling hell child will visit you in your dreams.

Have a good weekend friends! I have some very exciting news in store for fans of the blog and I hope you all are as excited as I am. Unfortunately, you’ll have to wait until next week to find out!

7 responses

  1. Up All Night! Such a funny show. GOB! Also, last night they were fighting about watching Friday Night Lights, and I am currently mad that Winn jumped ahead in said tv show. He’s 5 episodes ahead of me! Also, I love Tim Riggins.

  2. Pingback: PAJAMURAI! | HEAVY EVAN

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