More ‘Motional Metaphors

I realized I forgot to show you my favorite photo from this weekend’s fun and frivolity:Santa fishing. I really hope that is a snowman in the back paddling or my view of Santa as a doting husband has disintegrated verily.

I decided to break out the Cake Batter Cashew Butter for breakfast this morning. It was AMAZING. I don’t know what mom put in this stuff (although knowing her it was all healthy and organic) but it is my new crack. I wish I had gotten a full size mason jar full.

Nikki got very sick this morning, and we are not quite sure why. Since there seems to always be a stomach virus going around, (where do people get this news by the way? Is there a Virus daily mag I don’t know about?) that might be what has stricken her. I had initially gone into work, but she called me upset around 8:30 so I came home. My morning has been full of taking care of Nikki and then inexplicably watching 16 and Pregnant when she falls asleep. I hate to believe in stereotypes, but all these girls live with their Meemaws and have behavioral issues. Aren’t there any well adjusted pregnant teenagers? I guess they wouldn’t make good tv if they were studying and going to bible study.

I have been meaning to add a new page to my blog that features all the great blogs I peruse daily. There really is a wealth of information and infotainment out there and I’d like to give them all a shout out. One blog that really stuck out to me was the latest entry in the “Stuffed with Emptiness” series from Tina over at Best Body Fitness. This series is directly responsible for my starting this blog. I never realized how many people had similar problems to my own, and (I know it’s a little bigoted of me) I never realized that a woman could suffer from them. Binge eating is a very serious problem and all you have to do is watch some sort of expose on the local news and see all the headless obese people to realize this. I use humor in my posts because this is how I have trained myself to deal with difficult life problems and it just makes me comfortable. Please don’t think that I don’t take this very seriously.

By the way, I bring this up because I had a little run in with binge eating today. Nikki had fallen asleep again and visions of Peanut Butter Balls starting dancing in my head. “What does it matter?” I thought. “I could reach in and eat one and no one would be the wiser.” But, for some unknown reason, I pulled the whole bag out and placed it on my nightstand. I queued up National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation and popped no less than five PBB’s in my mouth (not at the same time, ironically). I feel gross, I feel like a failure, and I am disappointed in my formerly steely resolve. Tina’s post encouraged me because she is a very successful woman, mother, and personal trainer, and she still has urges to binge eat. This is encouraging, and terrifying. I know I can achieve all I want to be, but this demon will still be sitting on my shoulder, waiting to tickle my ear with words dripping in high fructose corn syrup (Corn sugar? Nice try corn conglomerates). I will have to lean more on God to find the strength to resist, but for now I feel good knowing that it is at least possible. Thank you, faithful readers, for all of your encouragement. I will need more of it as time goes on. Have faith in me, and we can both achieve great dietary goals. There will be hurdles though, and we will trip over them.

We are not in the best of shape you know.

But I’ll help you up, if you help me.


8 responses

  1. Thanks for the link to Tina’s blog.

    Don’t be too hard on yourself about the PBBs. I find that the times I’ve slipped haven’t been the big occasions, the moments I’ve thought about & planned for, like parties or holiday meals. They are the times when I’m actually relaxed and not thinking about it. I slip back into old habits, old ways of comforting myself. I’m sure I’ll continue to slip, so the best I can do is recognize it and pull back.

    Thank goodness for the blog-o-sphere! These interwebs … what would we do without them!?

  2. Okay, so you ate some peanut butter balls. That doesn’t negate all the days you have gone without carbonated beverages or the days that you haven’t eaten anything containing sugar.

  3. It’s all God, brother. He is my daily strength…and He is there for you just as much as He is for me. Keep leaning on Him, opening up, learning from past experiences/triggers, and growing and healing. Which you ARE doing. it’s a long process…but you’ll get there. You’ll get there. 🙂

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